One non sequitur at a time.
Sane as Drunk

Through the years we all will be together… if the fates allow.

Well, the fates didn’t allow.

First Christmas without you, Neen. It’s going to be so hard. And really weird. I hope we never get used to this. I hope we always keep an empty seat where you should be, to remind us not just how much we miss you, but how blessed we were to even have you in our lives.

What I wouldn’t give for one more Christmas with you. One more day with you. One more hour.

I want to believe in heaven so fiercely because I want so badly to see you again. I’ve lost a lot of people in my life but this is by far the worst. I’ve never taken anything so hard.

I don’t want us to fall apart. I feel it all fraying at the edges and I can’t bear the thought of losing this wonderful family that you helped craft and hold together.

I know you will be here with us… as much as is possible. The memories you left are some of the best I have. There is a piece of you in every room of my house. But without your laugh, your jokes, your sarcastic comments… Christmas just doesn’t feel like Christmas. And I swear I’m really trying.

I’m trying to have a Merry Little Christmas… but I need a little help.

  1. kathrynintrees posted this